A friend sent me this e-mail.
An atheist was walking through the woods.
"What majestic trees!"
"What powerful rivers!"
"What beautiful animals!"
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charging towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him. He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer. He tripped & fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant the atheist cried out, "Oh my God!"
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. "You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident."
"Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"
The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"
"Very well," said the voice. The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed.
And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:
"Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."
Posted by Sue Ballmann
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Today's Daily Word - Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Prosperity
I live in a world of abundance and gratefully receive the blessings of God.
With deep gratitude, I acknowledge that I live in a world of abundance. The abundance in nature inspires and enlivens me. Each creature, large and small, has its own role to play. The plants and trees, oceans and rivers—even rock formations—are a celebration of beauty, bounty, and diversity.
Sometimes exactly what I need seems to come from nowhere. The book I pull off the shelf opens to just the information I need. A career opportunity appears out of the blue. As if by chance, I meet someone special who enriches my life.
Such blessings do not happen by chance; they come from God. My physical, material, emotional, and spiritual needs are fulfilled by God, the source of all good.
"Every generous act of giving, with every perfect gift, is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." —James 1:17
From Sharon Stallings and posted by Sue Ballmann
I live in a world of abundance and gratefully receive the blessings of God.
With deep gratitude, I acknowledge that I live in a world of abundance. The abundance in nature inspires and enlivens me. Each creature, large and small, has its own role to play. The plants and trees, oceans and rivers—even rock formations—are a celebration of beauty, bounty, and diversity.
Sometimes exactly what I need seems to come from nowhere. The book I pull off the shelf opens to just the information I need. A career opportunity appears out of the blue. As if by chance, I meet someone special who enriches my life.
Such blessings do not happen by chance; they come from God. My physical, material, emotional, and spiritual needs are fulfilled by God, the source of all good.
"Every generous act of giving, with every perfect gift, is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." —James 1:17
From Sharon Stallings and posted by Sue Ballmann
Update on the Purvis Family
Please continue to remember the Purvis family in your prayers. They lost two teenage children in a tragic auto accident last week.
PLEASE NOTE THAT FR. DAN WILL BE OFFERING THE 8:00 AM MASS ON THURSDAY MORNING, NOVEMBER 15, 2007 FOR ALYSON AND RYAN PURVIS.
The following is the death notice from the Washington Post:
PURVIS ALYSON MICHELLE PURVIS "Aly" (17) RYAN JESSE PURVIS "Purple" (14) On Monday, November 5, 2007 and Friday, November 9, 2007 of Chesapeake Beach, MD. Beloved children of Robert and Susan Purvis; loving sister and brother of Emma Margaret; grandchildren of Lorna J. and the late George Nicholas Purvis, Jr. and Gail Jones and Joseph Jones, Jr. Family will receive friends at the LEE FUNERAL HOME, CALVERT, P.A., 8125 Southern Maryland Blvd. (Rte 4 & Fowler Rd.) Owings, MD on Wednesday from 2 to 4 pm and 6 to 9 p.m. Service will be held at Chesapeake Church, 6201 Solomons Island Rd., Huntingtown, MD on Thursday, November 15 at 11 a.m. Interment Chesapeake Highlands Memorial Gardens, Port Republic, MD. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to the “Stommel Enterprises, Inc. Memorial Account for the Purvis Family”, 10130 Southern Maryland Blvd., Dunkirk, Maryland 20754.
Published in The Washington Post on 11/12/2007.
Friends may want to go online to the Washington Post and sign the guestbook.
Also received in a related e-mail:
Donations are being accepted via a Memorial account that has been set up with SunTrust Bank by Exit 1 Stop Reality. The family faces enormous expenses due to this tragedy. No donation is too small and will be greatly appreciated. Please pass this along to whomever you think might
be interested. Please make checks payable to: 'Stommel Enterprises Inc, Memorial Account for the Purvis Family', Lee Funeral Home or the Purvis Family directly.
Donations can be mailed to:
Exit 1 Stop Realty
10130 Southern Maryland Blvd
Dunkirk, MD 20754
Receive their souls , O holy ones; present them now to God, Most High. Lord graciously hear us!
Postd by Sue Ballmann
PLEASE NOTE THAT FR. DAN WILL BE OFFERING THE 8:00 AM MASS ON THURSDAY MORNING, NOVEMBER 15, 2007 FOR ALYSON AND RYAN PURVIS.
The following is the death notice from the Washington Post:
PURVIS ALYSON MICHELLE PURVIS "Aly" (17) RYAN JESSE PURVIS "Purple" (14) On Monday, November 5, 2007 and Friday, November 9, 2007 of Chesapeake Beach, MD. Beloved children of Robert and Susan Purvis; loving sister and brother of Emma Margaret; grandchildren of Lorna J. and the late George Nicholas Purvis, Jr. and Gail Jones and Joseph Jones, Jr. Family will receive friends at the LEE FUNERAL HOME, CALVERT, P.A., 8125 Southern Maryland Blvd. (Rte 4 & Fowler Rd.) Owings, MD on Wednesday from 2 to 4 pm and 6 to 9 p.m. Service will be held at Chesapeake Church, 6201 Solomons Island Rd., Huntingtown, MD on Thursday, November 15 at 11 a.m. Interment Chesapeake Highlands Memorial Gardens, Port Republic, MD. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to the “Stommel Enterprises, Inc. Memorial Account for the Purvis Family”, 10130 Southern Maryland Blvd., Dunkirk, Maryland 20754.
Published in The Washington Post on 11/12/2007.
Friends may want to go online to the Washington Post and sign the guestbook.
Also received in a related e-mail:
Donations are being accepted via a Memorial account that has been set up with SunTrust Bank by Exit 1 Stop Reality. The family faces enormous expenses due to this tragedy. No donation is too small and will be greatly appreciated. Please pass this along to whomever you think might
be interested. Please make checks payable to: 'Stommel Enterprises Inc, Memorial Account for the Purvis Family', Lee Funeral Home or the Purvis Family directly.
Donations can be mailed to:
Exit 1 Stop Realty
10130 Southern Maryland Blvd
Dunkirk, MD 20754
Receive their souls , O holy ones; present them now to God, Most High. Lord graciously hear us!
Postd by Sue Ballmann
Monday, November 12, 2007
Adventures in Late Nite Catechism
And we all thought Sunday was a day of rest??????? Our Sodality spent this Sunday afternoon in a 1960’s classroom complete with the JMJ on the top center of the chalkboard and the picture of President John F. Kennedy (“our best Catholic president ever”) taped to the board. Sister quizzed us RELENTLESSLY on the old days in Catholic school and such topics as Easter Duty and Stigmata. We discussed heaven, limbo, purgatory and H-E-double hockey sticks as part of our lesson.
It was interesting to see how much fear she brought out in everyone as she walked up and down that aisle with her ruler. Sister informed us that she prefers the rulers with the metal edges. The “students” were even raising their hands to use the bathroom. The really funny part was that when “students” were called upon to give answers in front of the class is that their friends all tried to whisper the answers in their ears as they stood up in the “classroom” with their knees knocking to answer Sister’s questions in very timid voices. This, of course, also got their friends in trouble. Complete sentences were required for all answers beginning with, “Sister, the answer is …” We all laughed so hard that our muscles still ache.
Fortunately, no one in our class earned a seat in the chair in the corner of the classroom for bad behavior. Sister brought out one of the little chairs she had made over the years. It was small step stool, and the back of the chair was made from some of the many broken rulers that had snapped over the years as she whipped her students into shape. She informed us that she will be raising funds by selling some of these chairs on e-Bay.
She reminded us the priest used to have his back to the people to say Mass in Latin before Vatican II. Now he is turned around facing the people so that Mass looks like a cooking show. She quickly put those students who were dressed inappropriately in their place. She even made one student cover herself up with a tissue (like a bib) because was revealing too much skin.
Pursuant to a request from the Vatican, we voted on which saints should retain their status as saints (since there are way too many saints now) or whether they would join St. Christopher in – I was going to say limbo – but she reminded us that got abolished not once, but twice, so I am not sure what happened to him. St. Anthony was apparently kept on the list as his help was successfully invoked by a prayer to find a jacket lost by an audience member.
We also discussed the proper use of a St. Joseph statue. It has long been a custom to bury a St. Joseph statue in your yard when you are selling your home. (There have even been two very large stories about this practice in the Washington Post over the years.) When you are selling your house, it must be placed upside down in your front yard facing YOUR house. Otherwise you may suffer the plight of one of the audience members who accidentally turned the statue towards his neighbor’s house. The neighbor’s house sold instead of his own home.
At the conclusion of class, Sister told us that she has been doing this show for seven years. In that time, this theatre group has raised millions of dollars by collecting money after each show for different orders of local nuns, After all, it is not a true Catholic gathering without a collection!!!!!!!!!!! She stood outside with a large basket to collect money for the Holy Cross Sisters, the Sisters of Mercy and a third group that I can’t remember. One hundred percent of that money goes to the directly nuns themselves.
After the show, we raced across the street to secure some seats at The Olney Ale House a long tradition in Olney. We continued to reminisce and laugh there over a wonderful meal.
Check back here shortly for some pictures we took. I am having a hard time getting them up.
Posted by Sue Ballmann
It was interesting to see how much fear she brought out in everyone as she walked up and down that aisle with her ruler. Sister informed us that she prefers the rulers with the metal edges. The “students” were even raising their hands to use the bathroom. The really funny part was that when “students” were called upon to give answers in front of the class is that their friends all tried to whisper the answers in their ears as they stood up in the “classroom” with their knees knocking to answer Sister’s questions in very timid voices. This, of course, also got their friends in trouble. Complete sentences were required for all answers beginning with, “Sister, the answer is …” We all laughed so hard that our muscles still ache.
Fortunately, no one in our class earned a seat in the chair in the corner of the classroom for bad behavior. Sister brought out one of the little chairs she had made over the years. It was small step stool, and the back of the chair was made from some of the many broken rulers that had snapped over the years as she whipped her students into shape. She informed us that she will be raising funds by selling some of these chairs on e-Bay.
She reminded us the priest used to have his back to the people to say Mass in Latin before Vatican II. Now he is turned around facing the people so that Mass looks like a cooking show. She quickly put those students who were dressed inappropriately in their place. She even made one student cover herself up with a tissue (like a bib) because was revealing too much skin.
Pursuant to a request from the Vatican, we voted on which saints should retain their status as saints (since there are way too many saints now) or whether they would join St. Christopher in – I was going to say limbo – but she reminded us that got abolished not once, but twice, so I am not sure what happened to him. St. Anthony was apparently kept on the list as his help was successfully invoked by a prayer to find a jacket lost by an audience member.
We also discussed the proper use of a St. Joseph statue. It has long been a custom to bury a St. Joseph statue in your yard when you are selling your home. (There have even been two very large stories about this practice in the Washington Post over the years.) When you are selling your house, it must be placed upside down in your front yard facing YOUR house. Otherwise you may suffer the plight of one of the audience members who accidentally turned the statue towards his neighbor’s house. The neighbor’s house sold instead of his own home.
At the conclusion of class, Sister told us that she has been doing this show for seven years. In that time, this theatre group has raised millions of dollars by collecting money after each show for different orders of local nuns, After all, it is not a true Catholic gathering without a collection!!!!!!!!!!! She stood outside with a large basket to collect money for the Holy Cross Sisters, the Sisters of Mercy and a third group that I can’t remember. One hundred percent of that money goes to the directly nuns themselves.
After the show, we raced across the street to secure some seats at The Olney Ale House a long tradition in Olney. We continued to reminisce and laugh there over a wonderful meal.
Check back here shortly for some pictures we took. I am having a hard time getting them up.
Posted by Sue Ballmann
Monday, November 5, 2007
Prayers URGENTLY Needed for the Purvis Family
Sharon Stallings received this message in an e-mail from a friend earlier today:
Mary Eldridge is at the hospital with Rob and Sue Purvis. She is requesting we begin a prayer chain for Ryan Purvis who is in critical condition in Baltimore as well as The Purvis Family. He and his sister, Allison were driving to Northern High School this morning, November 5th, 2007 and were involved in a horrific car accident. For additional details, please see this link: http://www.nbc4.com/slideshow/news/14510971/detail.html
Sadly Allison passed away. Please pray for the Purvis family that God will comfort them in their time of sorrow, for Allison, that she is in God's kingdom of heaven with God's loving arms around her and for Ryan that God will be with him and will restore him back to his perfect health, and for the doctors who are treating them that God's hands will be with their hands to restore their child and for all of us who are grieving with Rob and Sue and their families.
Sharon also suggested praying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy for the family.
Posted by Sue Ballmann
Mary Eldridge is at the hospital with Rob and Sue Purvis. She is requesting we begin a prayer chain for Ryan Purvis who is in critical condition in Baltimore as well as The Purvis Family. He and his sister, Allison were driving to Northern High School this morning, November 5th, 2007 and were involved in a horrific car accident. For additional details, please see this link: http://www.nbc4.com/slideshow/news/14510971/detail.html
Sadly Allison passed away. Please pray for the Purvis family that God will comfort them in their time of sorrow, for Allison, that she is in God's kingdom of heaven with God's loving arms around her and for Ryan that God will be with him and will restore him back to his perfect health, and for the doctors who are treating them that God's hands will be with their hands to restore their child and for all of us who are grieving with Rob and Sue and their families.
Sharon also suggested praying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy for the family.
Posted by Sue Ballmann
Meeting on Thursday, November 8, 2007
Just a reminder that our monthly meeting will be Thursday, November 8, 2007 at the church. We will start with some prayers in the Chapel at 7:00 pm, and then we will move to Doran Hall for the balance of the meeting.
We will be having a guest speaker Eileen O'Steen to discuss a charitable project she is involved with. Eileen lost her son Ryan to a rare genetic disorder in 2001. Since that time, her family has been involved in building a state of the art playground for special needs children in Calvert County. Her family is now working with Hospice House as they build a new 10,000 square foot facility on Sixes Road. They are helping to fund a children's play/therapy room in the building. I am sure her talk will be fascinating. This will be an outstanding opportunity to hear more about issues which impact all of us.
We will also be discussing our upcoming events - of which there will be many. Please come and bring your calendars so our exciting activities will be the first on your books.
If you are going to see Late Nite Catechism with us, please bring your money to the meeting. We need to have it collected before the day of the event. There are still a few remaining seats, so please invite any of your friends for a great time and a barrel of laughs. We will be convening at a local restaurant in Olney after the show to exchange stories and laugh about the play.
We are also encouraging you to bring any of your friends in the parish. This might be a good opportunity to reach out to someone who is new that you do not know yet. See you there!!!!!
Posted by Sue Ballmann
We will be having a guest speaker Eileen O'Steen to discuss a charitable project she is involved with. Eileen lost her son Ryan to a rare genetic disorder in 2001. Since that time, her family has been involved in building a state of the art playground for special needs children in Calvert County. Her family is now working with Hospice House as they build a new 10,000 square foot facility on Sixes Road. They are helping to fund a children's play/therapy room in the building. I am sure her talk will be fascinating. This will be an outstanding opportunity to hear more about issues which impact all of us.
We will also be discussing our upcoming events - of which there will be many. Please come and bring your calendars so our exciting activities will be the first on your books.
If you are going to see Late Nite Catechism with us, please bring your money to the meeting. We need to have it collected before the day of the event. There are still a few remaining seats, so please invite any of your friends for a great time and a barrel of laughs. We will be convening at a local restaurant in Olney after the show to exchange stories and laugh about the play.
We are also encouraging you to bring any of your friends in the parish. This might be a good opportunity to reach out to someone who is new that you do not know yet. See you there!!!!!
Posted by Sue Ballmann
Sunday, November 4, 2007
Update on Father Jordan
I have been informed that Fr. Jordan has made substantial progress in his recovery in the last few days. He has been resting quietly. I understand he is expected to leave the hospital soon so that he can go into hibernation for a few months to speed his full recovery. Since he is never one to stay idle, sources say that he is currently working on another doctorate degree - this one in soap operas!!! HA, HA!!!!! Please continue to remember him in your prayers.
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